This Could Change Your Life “But” You May Not Be Ready

Haven’t you paid your dues by now?  You have worked extremely hard, putting your nose to the grindstone devotedly.  When you put your head on the pillow at night it feels like you have just completed a full body skid into home plate after running the bases all day long.  You have big dreams, but sometimes it seems like life just gets in the way and days, even months, go by with little or no momentum toward the life you planned for yourself.  There was a time in my life that I felt like this too.  No matter how hard I worked, I just kept running along the gerbil wheel of life and just could not, for the life of me, jump off it.  Then one day, it all changed.  What I finally realized was that my life wasn’t moving along the path I had planned because of one tiny word that had slinked silently into my vocabulary, hiding out unnoticed, infesting my life for the worse.

But.

But, she’s smarter, prettier, stronger than me.

But, my competition has more money than I do.

But, I was never that good in school.

But, there are at least 100 other people applying for that job.

But, I am too young (or too old).

But, it has never been done.

Are you infested by “buts?”  It is such a tiny word.  It comes across as neutral, non-threatening, simple.  “But” is cunning.  “But” is the destroyer of dreams.  Like the devil, “but” is always on your shoulder silently waiting to offer you an excuse as to why you cannot do something.  “But” limits you. It steals your greatest visions. “But” wants you to know that you cannot be, do, and have anything in the world you want, and it offers you the reasons why.  “But” is the doubt, fear, and coward in you.  Destroy “but” and your dreams are yours for the taking.

If you have had enough of the status quot; If you are ready for something bigger and better;  If you are ready to grab onto your dreams for dear life; you must jettison the infestation of buts.  Here’s how:

Step One: Become conscious of the “buts” so you may eradicate them.

Step Two:  Affirmations.  Upon waking up each morning say to yourself, “I can be, do, and have anything in the world.  I am humbled by the opportunity that surrounds me.  Today I will move forward toward my dreams for the benefit of me, my family, and the community.”  Repeat this again before bed.

Step Three: Replace “but” with “so what?”

So what?

She’s smarter, prettier, stronger than me. So what?

My competition has more money than I do. So what?

I was never that good in school. So what?

There are at least 100 other people applying for that job. So what?

I am too young (or too old). So what?

It has never been done.  So what?

Step Four: Take the 21 day But Free Challenge.  Research suggests that it takes 21 days to create a new habit.  For the next 21 days, wear a rubber band on your wrist.  When you catch yourself limiting your life with a “but”, snap the rubber band, move it to your other wrist, and start the 21 days process all over again.

Discover your hidden talents. Turn fear into confidence. Unlock your potential.  All that stands between you and your greatest destiny are three little letters.  Don’t worry, you can take them.

Stacey Alcorn is the author of REACH! and Tuned In. She is a business strategy and sales consultant for large corporations and Global Fortune 100 Firms. She is also a keynote speaker, blogger, trainer, and start-up consultant. Her sales training products have been licensed by hundreds of organizations around the world who use her one-of-a kind sales training materials as the genesis for their own brand growth. Make sure to sign up here for my REACH! Weekly News for awesome interviews with Leaders & Visionaries that I only share with my VIP members.

Dale Carnegie on Sending a Card

It’s no secret, my all time favorite sales and business book is Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. I often joke that this book is more valuable than a college education. The funny thing is, I’m not joking. I often think about how Dale Carnegie would see things in today’s world. In fact, in today’s world of social networking it seems that our networks are almost as intimate as they were before there were vehicles. It’s awesome that we have the ability today to stay so closely connected to friends from twenty years ago, business associates from past jobs, and old roommates we haven’t talked to in years. All that being said, I think there are some things that Dale Carnegie might argue we need to get back to. With all of the changes that have brought society close together, there are still some things we can do in life and business to create extra special bonds, the kind that social networks are incapable of cultivating.

Here’s a quote from Carnegie’s How To Win Friends and Influence People:

For years I made a point to find out the birthdays of my friends. How? Although I haven’t the foggiest bit of faith in astrology I began by asking the other party whether he believed the date of one’s birth has anything to do with character and disposition. I then asked him or her to tell me their month and day of birth. If he or she said November 24th, for example, I kept repeating to myself, November 24th, November 24th. The minute my friend’s back was turned I wrote down their name and birthday and later would transfer it to a birthday book. At the beginning of each year I had these birthday dates scheduled in my calendar pad so that they came to my attention automatically. When the natal day arrived, there was my letter or telegram. What a hit it made! I was frequently the only person on earth who remembered. Showing genuine interest in others not only wins friends for you but may develop in its customers a loyalty to your company.

In our souped up world of social networks, cards today are more powerful than ever. Facebook is effective for reminding us of the birthdays of everyone in our network. It is ineffective in allowing you to stand out by wishing a heartfelt birthday wish. If you are interested in being mediocre and average, be one of the three hundred people that offers a contrived, “Happy Birthday!” on everyone’s Facebook wall. If you want to stand out and be exceptional, send a card. A card takes effort and that effort and appreciation means something to the receiver. If being exceptional is a buzz kill for you, because you really want to blow someone away, send a small gift too. The amount of money you spend is less important than the thought you expend.

Jay McHugh, an entrepreneur from Boston, has built a lucrative business through showing appreciation. He is the self proclaimed Appreciation Marketing Expert. He has utilized Send Out Cards as his platform for standing out from the crowd in business, and teaching others how to do the same. Like Dale Carnegie, McHugh has built an amazing business through simple acts of appreciation. McHugh admits that he has it easier than Dale Carnegie ever did because social networks offer up not only the birthdays of our sphere but also other types of promptings that allow him the opportunity to show his appreciation to others.

Why be ordinary when extraordinary is a viable option? Appreciate others and you will stand out from the ocean of ordinary people in business. It’s just that easy.

You can learn more about Jay at www.MyRandomActsofCardness.com.

Stacey Alcorn is the author of REACH! and Tuned In. She is a business strategy and sales consultant for large corporations and Global Fortune 100 Firms. She is also a keynote speaker, blogger, trainer, and start-up consultant. Her sales training products have been licensed by hundreds of organizations around the world who use her one-of-a kind sales training materials as the genesis for their own brand growth. Make sure to sign up here for my REACH! Weekly News for awesome interviews with Leaders & Visionaries that I only share with my VIP members.